Dirty Laundry...Skeletons

About that other blog. I started getting all emotional and had to write straight away. I have finished rehearsing for today.
Where do I start?
Last week I get a phone call from an unknown number - seeing as though only a select few have my phone number, I am hesitant to answer, but I do. It's my Dad. My sister had passed on my number. I say hello and that I have to go (I was at work).
I go to the studio for a few hours of recording .. then head home, it's late and I am tired. So I crash. I wake up later that night to a missed call and a text message. "dash, it's dad, i just want to talk to you". I tell my sister about it, and she informs me as to what he wants to talk about.
Apparently, via my blogging and old Facebook, he "discovered" that I am not quite straight. Saying he is the last person to find out. Really? All those years growing up calling me a "pansy" "poof" & one I will never forget "clarence" (i was cross eyed) and referring to homosexuals as "bloody fags/poofs" calling the lifestyle "disgusting". I kind of thought he knew. He wonders why I don't want to talk to him.
I used to lie to my friends and tell them that I had a great relationship with my Dad. I don't, and doubt I will.
This is the person that denied I was even his child before I was even born. Then still denied me when he saw me as a baby. When he finally acknowledged my existance, he put me down, shut me down until the day he and Mom split (best day ever). I felt a weight lifted off my shoulders.
Afew years later, I moved interstate with a friend and my life really took a turn - I was living for me.
Anyway back to Dad finding out... My sister said he was on the internet researching how to approach a gay son, how to act, what to say - and that he wanted to tell me that "it's okay to be gay"... I'm sorry, but I can't stand that saying. Who is he to tell me that it's okay .. just, okay to be me. Being gay doesn't define who I am. I don't wear my sexuality on my sleeve.I've been without him telling me anything for more than half my life.
No, I don't have Dad issues. Just needed a vent.
It's fucking great to be me.
-Dash xoxo
ps and all the family beating around the bush "does dash have a girlfriend yet?" ... i wish they'd speak to me and not through my Mom.